Module summary/questionnaire

"And now, the end is near; And so I face the final curtain......."

Age? 20

Sex? Female

What is your degree subject (both if joint)? Sociology

Does ‘Being Bad’ relate well to the other modules you are taking?
Not directly but the underlying ideas are in some of my other modules

If so, how? And if not, why not?
Some of my modules are theory based.

Have you found ‘Being Bad’ too demanding, too easy, or at an appropriate level?
appropriate

Do you think the list of topics covered on the module was appropriate?
Yes

Are there any topics not included in the module that you would like to see included?
Drinking, swearing or health

Do you think that the format for classes has worked well?
I think the group might of been a bit too big but lectures were good.

What did you think of the module team?
Brilliant, maybe a tad slow at marking assignments!!!!!

Do you think it would have been better to have had more:
Small group discussions? No
Discussion and debate among the class as a whole? Maybe
Information and talk from lecturers? Yes

The approach taken in the module is interdisciplinary (drawing on perspectives from English Literature, Film Studies, Creative Writing, Philosophy, Religious Studies, Media Studies and Politics): do you think this a useful way of approaching the topics covered in the module?
Yes, because I mainly do sociology modules.

Do you think that interdisciplinary modules are a good idea?
yes, it gives a broader outlook.

Do you think you have benefited from the interdisciplinary approach taken in the module?
Yes

Would you like to see more modules that cover this kind of subject matter?
Possibly

Are you planning to take the follow-up module PH2004 ‘It Shouldn’t Be Allowed’ at level 2?
No

Would you recommend ‘Being Bad’ to a friend?
Yes

Do you think that the blogs (web logs) were a good idea?
Yes, it allows people to see other peoples views

What did you think of the other assessments (e.g. would it be better to have one longer assessment rather than two shorter ones?)?
I think they could of been a bit longer but I liked having the choice of more than one topic.

What have you learned from the module?
I think I have learnt more tolerance and also that there are never really anything that is always bad.

What parts of the module have you found most useful and why?
I found the range of topics interesting and the chance to write creative pieces and blogs useful. I liked the more casual style of assessment.

What parts do you think were a waste of time and why?
I think some of the waiting for technology was a waste of time.

Are there any other comments you wish to make regarding ‘Being Bad’?
Nope







"............ I did it my way!!!!!!"



(Lyrics from http://www.lyricsfreak.com/f/frank+sinatra/my+way_20056378.html)

Comment on Neelam's blog (Porn)

Neelam says "Its disgusting, how women and men can degrade themselves like that, is beyond me." and I would agree. I think becoming a 'porn star' is quite degrading but at the same time I think that it is still up to an individuals personal choice. As for "people that watch porn are desperate" I completely disagree. I think it is far better for a person to use porn and masturbate than for them to go out and have one night stands with random people. I think there is no problem with couples watching porn if it enhances their sex lives (apart from the fact it encourages the porn industry). It is no different, in my opinion, to having sexual fantasies about other people or something that would not happen.

I understand the point that sex should be a special thing between two people but anything that makes it better and doesn't hurt anyone else can't be a bad thing, well that's what i think anyway!

Comment on J.T2's blog (teenage pregnancy)

I agree with Jay on the idea that our government needs to do more about teenage pregnancy. I think that we need better sex education lessons in schools. Not just sex education but relationship education too. Children need to be taught that sex can be dangerous (what with STIs, STDs and chance of pregnancy) but also that it can be a beautiful thing if its between two people that love each other. I also agree with the idea that teenagers aren't all irresponsible and that some are just unlucky. Although the idea of people only thinking in the here and now does sound irresponsible to me.

discrimination (including positive)

Positive discrimination is my pet hate. Two years ago before I started university I was looking at becoming a primary school teacher. I looked at taster courses at local universities to make sure that course was for me but I couldn't go to any of them. Half of them were for ethnic minorities and although I was technically an ethnic minority in my college it doesn't count. The other half were for single parents. So to get on a taster course I either needed to change the colour of my skin or have a baby damn quick! (wonders vaguely if they would actual check if someone had a baby if they claimed to be a single parent)

All in all discrimination is generally bad because it prioritises one person over another for a reason they are unable to change but discrimination still happens. I think people discriminate due to prejudices, they simple believe one type of person is inferior or they do it subconsciously. I think positive discrimination isn't seen as bead because it is 'readdressing the balance'.

But is discrimination bad? One of my family members has said that they don't like gay people or black people and therefore would chose not to spend time with them by choice. They have no hatred for them just would prefer to spend time with 'their own kind' (white straight people). Is this bad? We make choices everyday and have preferences on most things. Is it bad to prefer to be with a certain type of people. I think probably not, up to a point. I think that personal choice is fine but I don't think anyone deserves to be at a disadvantage because of peoples prejudices.

It's bad to have prejudices but nearly everyone has them. Maybe its instinctual.

Comment on Sadyia's blog (religion)

After looking at the link of Sadyia's blog entry about religion I found out about some religions I've never heard of before. It is a good site full of information and I recommend everyone has a quick read.

I disagree with her point about preaching and debating. I personally think that debating can be interesting without leading to arguments but I think preaching can cause more upset. The people who stand in the street yelling that Jesus will save us on similar annoy me. I don't mind debating with people and listening to their views when I'm in the right mood but I'd rather not have religion shouted at me when I'm going about my daily business. Preaching can far to often involve 'This is the right religion and there is no other' rather than teaching or informing others.

ROB'S A SNOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last weekend we (me and my boyfriend) joined some of my family (2 aunts, 2 uncles, mum, dad, sister, 2 cousins, 3 second cousins) for a big meet up somewhere near Lowestoft (near Norwich roughly, by the sea!).

The weekend involved many instances of being bad ranging from drinking too much to ganging up on people in arguments.

My aunt had an interesting response when asked if she wanted to open another bottle of wine " I really shouldn't but I will anyway". She didn't need much persuading! We all drank enough to get jolly and ended up in a discussion that revolved around my boyfriend's (Rob's) 'snob'erry. My aunt and Rob clash a bit anyway and end up in debate/arguments because of their differing views. The whole group of us kind of ganged up on Rob and said he was a snob, for amongst other things, refusing to buy a new suit from boundary mill. As result I ended up sitting on the floor next to Rob saying "Rob's a snob" every time there was a gap in the conversation. I couldn't actually remember why Rob is/was a snob but after asking Rob it's apparently because he owns no proper (that keep you warm) jumpers, would like to only shop at M&S for food, is picky about his food and only like Stella off draught not from bottles.

So back to the topic at hand who was being bad?

• my family for picking on Rob and poking fun at his beliefs


• Rob for being a snob/picky


• all of the drunkards for getting drunk!

and why did we do it? because it was all good fun

For my own personal safety I must point out that all our poking fun and saying "Rob's the snob" was all in jest and not meant to hurt anyone!

Gambling

Can I put my whole life, boyfriend and university life on black please! Actually no wait 5p might be a better bet.

I'm not a big gambler but at the same time I don't think it's wrong. I just think that many gambles are not worth it. I do obviously have gambles like insurance or buying things at the risk they will be on sale the next day.

I don't play the lottery or scratchcards or bet on sports. I think that I would probably make more money buy just putting the money I would of bet in a jar and save it up. I mean over the year if I played the lottery every week I would get £52, probably more than how much I would win unless I was incredible lucky. I have studied a lot of maths/stats in the past so I guess I have a good idea about chances and when you consider you have more chance of being hit by lightning than winning the lottery (and I'm not expecting to be hit by lightning anytime soon) the chances of me becoming a millionaire seem very slim. For information on how to increase your chances see this BBC page.

Everyone makes small bets though, it is surely of no worldly consequence whether I lose a bet to my boyfriend and have to make him breakfast. I can understand why some people would think gambling in all forms would be bad though because there is a risk of losing everything. Some people are lucky like Ashley Revell but others aren't. There is also the risk of getting addicted and addictions are generally seen as bad.

I assume people just do it for the thrill or they think they have a significant chance. Everyone dreams about being rich and as they say money makes the world go round.

Telling lies with integrity

Last weeks lecture was on lying instead of comedians. That suited me well as I have written my 2nd assignment on lying already and wanted to check it matched up to the lecture.

During the lecture we looked at whether lying was ever for non selfish reasons and whether being found out was what made lying bad. In my assignment I looked at some opinions which suggested lying was not wrong but the person being lied to finding out made it wrong.

We also looked at whether we are intentionally encouraged or taught how to lie when we are children. Thinking about this after the lecture i realised that certain games especially card games revolve around lying. As far as I can tell poker is basically about getting the best hand and persuading the people who have better hands than you to fold by acting like you are extremely confident with your hand. Isn't this lying? I don't think we are told we should lie when we are children or even taught directly to lie but I think that we pick it up. We learn by watching.

I'm not sure there is anyway to lie with integrity, I think all lying is wrong in principle yet has benefits too. The lecturer said that it was up to us to decide and that we should seriously consider whether we want to lie or not before we do. I think I will avoid lying where possible although using lying for jokes is just too much fun!!!

Bad cinema

Ummm what can I say, I was practising being bad during week 7.

Following the modules aims:

"To investigate the nature, place and meaning of immoral, dangerous, unhealthy, unreasonable or imprudent practices, behaviour and lifestyles. "
To consider critically questions about them, especially ‘what is to be said in their favour?’ and ‘what attracts people to them?’" (taken from the main PH1000 page of WOLF)

My being bad:
The nature of the badness- Skipping a lecture to go to Walkabout with my boyfriend and his mates

Place- Walkabout, Wolverhampton

Meaning- Naughty, bad, irresponsible, childish, rebellious

What is to be said in it's favour- I had a nice meal, interesting conversation about bestiality, I didn't go to a lecture that I considered had no effect on my assignment, feeling of freedom and choice

What attracted me to do it- persuasion from friends, lack of energy and interest in lecture topic, feeling of non conformity


Now before you all say well this is normal, I bunk all the time or I bet she will fail... I never bunked off school or college. Only when I got to university did I consider doing so. Yes many students do bunk off lectures more than me but it is very rare for me. My life is fairly moral (so long as you don't compare it to any religious text). The pull to be bad is just too strong.

I'm sorry!

computer games

I chose this topic from a book called 'Everything Bad is Good for You.' (Johnson, 2005, pp. 17-62)

With an increase in computer games and computer game consoles and with more children than ever playing these computer games it is important to find out the effects of these games on the people who play them.

There have been suggestions that computer games are unhealthy and encourage people to stay inside and play games rather than get fresh air and exercise. There may also be a link between certain types of computer games and criminal activity. An article in the Guardian (http://observer.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,6903,539166,00.html) quotes evidence which appears suggest reduction in ability due to computer games only stimulating small areas of the brain.

On the other hand there are studies that suggest computer games can improve hand-eye coordination and awareness skills.

It is bad because it obviously is not very active unless you get the new WII. It is however fun and a form of relaxation and leisure. It's private time or social time depending on who you play with. I know many people who play a few games with mates before or after going out. Lets just say playing dance mat games when your tipsy is great fun as is trying to sensibly play a F! game with the worst car in the game against your friend as Michael Schumacher!


Reference: Johnson, S. (2005) Everything Bad is Good for You. London: Penguin Books

good guys come last (comment on Emma's blog- Theatre of Cruelty)

After reading Emma's post on nice guys finishing last I wanted to add my own contribution to the topic. I know a lot of nice guys and they all seem to be losing out (except my boyfriend of course).

Most of them simply don't get the girls they like because they are too nice or too clingy. They want commitment and to think about the future. My boyfriend, a prime example is 23 and after a year together he already has plans about where he and us will be when he is 30 and 40. Most of it is career plans but he is already broody. he was mentioning weddings and babies about 6months in. Now this doesn't bother me too much because I made the first move and because I know I want all that with him one day but if your an independent woman and your man starts talking babies it can be scary.

I think the main problem with 'nice guys' is they meet the wrong sort of girls too. Girls seem to go through a phase of looking for fun and bad guys then they get realistic. They know you can't stay with a bad guy all your life. I think that guys do this too although some guys and girls seem to skip the risky stage. Nice guys need to find the good girls to match them.

I think the reason girls go for bad guys, coming back to the module objectives, are for the excitement, uncertainty, risk and because the bad guys have this weird charisma. You really know you shouldn't but something inside makes you long to be with them.

It is bad in many ways not just emotional, I mean you don't know where he's been so unless you are safety conscious you could pick up any number of nastys if you get as far as sex (see R U thinking).

I think the answer is nice guys with (what i call) a wild side. Love and lust all in the same person. It takes longer to find person like this but I believe its worth it.

Finally in answer to Emma's question: "Am I the only girl who likes it this way? I am I the only one who after 12 months or so in a relationship just gets terrified of comfort and craves lust rather than love?"
No your not but I think that is a commitment thing, everyone is afraid of being hurt and it's safer not to commit then you won't get hurt. We all get bored and need a change some people more than others. maybe try to make the relationship you've gone more exciting than look for a new one.

Look at me getting all agony aunt! I'll finish now because otherwise I will start thinking I know everything. One final point: Good guys do seem to get a bad deal but they will get there in the end, just get out and meet lots of people.

Not keeping yourself healthy

(the above picture is of a triple bypass burger, there is also a double or a quadruple available from some restaurants)

OK this seems simple enough

It's bad to:

• eat junk food
• get fat
• smoke
• drink too much
• take drugs
  

It's good to:

• get a balanced diet
• exercise
• have 5 fruit and veg a day
• get out and get fresh air
  

If it is really that simple then why does junk food taste so good? Why do we go for chips and pizza over vegetable stew (silly question really!)? Why drink at all?

I think today's lifestyle is becoming increasingly unhealthy. Now don't get me wrong I love my junk food, I don't want to preach because i am no position to. I just think it's important to notice that office jobs are more common than ever but extremely unhealthy. The lights don't give the full spectrum so more people get SAD (seasonal affective disorder), offices are full of stress and they make you rush lunch and go for convenience food.

We keep being told to live healthier lives but we seem to not do much about changing our lives, we just make up for the bad behaviour by spending time at the gym or detoxing.

It's a shame that unhealthy things like duvet days, TV, fast food and drinking are just so appealing. I enjoy being bad in this sense; it's easy and comforting.

Then again there is limits to how bad we can be, I am overweight officially but not obese, I don't feel ill so no problems of yet. Other people how ever are obese and are damaging their bodies. This story (from BBC News) is one of the most extreme. Connor McCreaddie is only 8 years old and weights over 14 stone! Apparently he has always had a dislike for fruit and veg. Maybe if he was eating these it would of been better,

tattoos and body piercing

After the VERY!!! interesting yet graphic lecture on modification I have surmised there are four types of modification which overlap. they are:

• non-invasive
• invasive
• temporary
• permanent

The possible reasons for body modification are:

• aesthetic/artistic
• religious
• rites of passage
• part of membership of a group
• sexual
• rebellion
• fashion
• body as a source of information/messages
• a form of control
• remembrance

The reasons it is seen as bad:

• religious
• societal
• medical
• pain
• racism/religious bigotry
• sexual morals

The types of body modification we looked at included

• piercings
• stretches
• splitting
• branding
• implants
• cutting/scarring
• corsettry
• plastic surgery
• high heels
• foot binding
• henna/mendhi
• tooth filing
• suspensions

I think the main thing I learnt in this lecture is how effective societies norms are at enforcing certain behaviours. In our culture women piercing their ears is considered normal and belly button piercings are only 'normal' for women. In comparison 'giraffe necking' women is normal in some cultures but not here. People who get piercings etc to rebel may not be rebelling as much as they think.

If you really want to rebel, and protect yourself from walruses I suggest something like this:

Money

An important topic for all of us I think!!!! Students are poor, let's face it but what are we choosing to spend our limited money on. Last year (I switched courses so was at uni then too) I was eating value food so I had more money to go out 'socialising'. This year I am spending more money on food (my boyfriend refuses to eat value foods and loves his brands) and on clothes.

None of that may sound bad but I realise how much money I spent last year on drinking compared to food it's shocking. Is it bad to spend the majority of your budget (after housing) on recreation?

What about spending money to get a train home because you can't be bothered to wait for the bus?
buying some new clothes when you don't actually need any?
a new laptop or computer when yours works fine (well OK it does what it needs to but would be better placed in an antiques shop)?


Is it right to use an overdraft, after all it is basically a loan, spending money you don't actually have.

What about uses for savings???
Is it bad to use your savings to clear your overdraft, if yes what if you clear your overdraft only to go overdrawn as bad again?
Or even using it as a loaning bank for significant others (no you can't have my money!!)?

The only person you are 'harming' is yourself so is it a personal choice or a problem? I have personally spent some of my savings on getting myself out of my overdraft yet don't seem to have the strictness to keep myself out. I guess it all depends on putting a price on an experience or product.


I'm sorry I came to no real conclusions in this post, it clearer my head a bit though. I hope it doesn't just fill your head with these questions instead.

Being too religious

Being religious is good because it gives people an aim and something to rely on. it's social and provides a sense of community.

The lecture looked at why "excessive religious behaviour" is bad. It was suggested that too much religion could be untrendy, too serious, restrictive, overly visible and can intimidate others.

The main issue, in my opinion, is religions place in society. it affects and is affected by many other aspects of society. It is linked to behaviour, equal opportunities, language, morals, social norms and stereotypes.

Another key issue is the move away from religion and towards spirituality. The statistics from the lecture show that church members are not only becoming less in percentage of the overall proportion but also in numbers or people. This could be due to people perceptions of it being unfashionable and repressive or the move towards rationality and individualism.

The final idea the lecture looked at were stereotypes of certain words linked with religion. The words that provoke strongest opinions include:

• satanist


• feng shui


• jehovah's witnesses


• buddhism


• cult

However I think one of the more personal ideas in the lecture was our opinions on what was acceptable display of religion. Practising religion, discussing religion, reading religious texts in public, wearing a symbol of your faith or wearing religious dress.

I personally think being religious is not bad in itself although I also think religion too often becomes an excuse for violence or abuse. I think symbols of personal faith are fine but forcing your beliefs on others should never be allowed. I am happy with my faith and beliefs, some may think I'll go to hell or its equivalent for those beliefs but they don't hurt anyone. Its my business.

I think this (BBC religion and ethics) is one of the best websites for learning about other religions.

Bandits and outlaws

Firstly we looked at the difference between bandits and social bandits. General bandits steal from anyone and everyone with no differentiation between people.

Social bandits were popular within their own communities, providing money for them, protecting them or not stealing from them. They were often rebels against the revolution but not in the political sense. They rebelled due to the general social upset, they did not cause it. Without the poor of their community behind them they were likely to have no protection and be at high risk of death.

some famous bandits include:

• Jesse James (USA)
• Ned Kelly (Australia)
• Bonnie and Clyde (USA)
• 'Pretty Boy' Floyd (USA)

These famous bandits were thought of as fairly good people even though they killed.

Being bandits is considered 'bad' because it involves violence, death, unfair politics, armies and deviation from the law. However bad people can be seen as good if they have a 'just' cause and bring equality to the disadvantaged.

Infidelity (post-lecture ideas)

Firstly there is a bit of a debate as to what exactly infidelity is. Does a one night stand count as infidelity or does it have to be an affair? If a string of one night stands continues as long as an affair then is that equivalent? Does 'looking but not touching' count? What about flirting?

I have a friend who is constantly flirting with everyone, not in a sexual way, that's just the way she is; flirty. If she was in a relationship would her personality make her a cheater all the time?

I think the best definition can be adapted from the all about life changes website. They say martial infidelity is "sexual unfaithfulness to a spouse" so that could be translated to infidelity is sexual unfaithfulness to a partner/boyfriend/girlfriend etc.

This definition only includes sexual acts though, personally I would consider it cheating if my partner snogged someone (except as a joke/pre-approved dare etc). I know he would too. He has even said that kissing, except peck on lips/cheek would be cheating. Hugging and quick pecks are OK.

Back to the point, infidelity is bad because it involves many 'bad' actions/ideas. It can include:

• lying


• taking advantage of other peoples weaknesses


• being manipulative


• being selfish


• taking risks


• faking/pretending

A lot of books and films suggest cheating is very common and almost glamorous. It's dangerous and exciting. Yet a lot of them end up with trouble. You rarely see people cheating and getting away with it through the whole story.

The possible reasons for cheating could be the personal need for more fulfillment than your current partner can give (i suggest you take a look back to week 4 if that's the case) or simply for the thrill. Neither are good reasons in my view. I guess another reason could be to make your partner dump you but I would prefer to do my dumping or be dumped honestly and with dignity.

Other interesting links:
Channel 4 sex and relationships - looks at all sides and what to do if you have cheated, been cheated on or the 3rd person.
BBC Sci/tech -suggests infidelity is natural

I'll leave you with some proper break up food, just in case you've been cheated on!!

Swearing

I have started swearing more recently but I was considering is it actually bad to swear. It is after all call bad language and we avoid teaching it to children. Is there anywhere where is it bad or isn't bad?

I think it's bad to swear in front of children but that makes no logical sense because when they get to my age they will know all the swear words anyway. I agree to swear at someone isn't nice if you are calling them a swear word. What about just swearing at the situation while they are there?

Here are a few other people's opinions:
http://www.cusscontrol.com/swearing.html - against swearing
http://www.castlenews.com/swearingfestival.html -now there is a festival for swearing!!!!

Comments on Meg's blog

I haven't actually posted a comment on Meg's blog (Just don't expect it to be good... )because I liked her topic and decided to put all my thoughts on the subject on my own blog (it wouldn't fit in the comment box anyway I expect).

The blog entry is titled "The EEEEEEVILS of alcohol".

I agree with her main problems on alcohol:
"Liver damage
Other organ damage
Drink drivers
Rape, street fights etc
Drinks being spiked."

but also I think the risk of acting like a complete idiot, getting arrested or otherwise told off for those idiotic actions or getting angry. Some people I know claim to be complete 'happy drunks' and that's fine. I on the other hand can become an 'angry drunk'. Fortunately when I'm angry I tend to bang and crash about then cry rather than trying to fight people so no harm done (at least physically).

I'm not going to say alcohol is completely evil because I have been drunk and quite enjoyed it at times. My family are regular drinkers but its a social thing. I personally am trying to cut back on my drinking. I enjoy tipsy but don't like being drunk. I always say I'm going to give up then never do.

I honestly think it's not good for me, emotionally.


Anyway back on topic:
It is a popular activity due to the generally nice feeling people experience to start with and the loss of inhibitions which allow people to have fun in ways they wouldn't usually. It can also be considered bad due to the affects on your health, links with violence, increase risk of getting up to things you really shouldn't and higher chance of accidents.

A few sites about alcohol:
Alcohol Concern -against alcohol drinking mainly
Know you limits- promotes sensible drinking
Alcohol stuff- pro-drinking, drinking games and cocktail recipes
Mind, body and soul (wired for health)- has a quiz on alcohol and some basic info
BBC-Health- has the calorie content of the most common drinks
BBC- Science-Hot topics- Alcohol- has a game and a quiz as well as a debate on drinking

To conclude drinking is a legal, popular past-time which has many negative side effect but also gives the drinker an overall good feeling. So bad for you but good fun!!!!!

infidelity (pre-lecture ideas)

First thoughts on infidelity are definitely towards why it is bad and wrong. The break up or couples and families; the lies and the cheating. I can also see the attraction to affairs either through boredom or if a person wants to leave the relationship. I personally would never cheat even if I found someone I loved more I would finish with my current partner first, I feel that is only fair.

According to the BBC relationship site

"Although there are many reasons for affairs, most fall into one of four categories:
The boat-rocking affair - when one partner has an underlying dissatisfaction with the relationship. The affair is an unconscious way of drawing attention to the problem and bringing things into the open.
The exit affair - when an affair is used to get out of a relationship. Rather than confront the fact that a relationship isn't working, an affair forces the issue.
The thrill affair - the illicit nature of an affair brings with it an adrenaline rush. Add to that the excitement of sex with someone new and the romantic trimmings of a fresh relationship, and it can seem irresistible.
The three's company affair - can go on for years; it can also describe a string of successive affairs. Some people find it difficult to commit to one person; they feel stifled by monogamy and fear putting all their emotional eggs in one basket. Having a third person on the scene can provide an outlet for difficult emotions."

I think as the BBC has suggested there is also the excitement in taking a risk, a similar experience as in the shoplifting topic.

Net doctor look at whether an affair can be good and they say:

"The early days of an affair are usually all about illicit excitement and sex. And it's quite common for the participants to believe that they can control what's happening and just have a harmless bit of fun. Unfortunately, 99 times out of 100, one of the lovers begins to want something more. Minds get involved as well as genitals. Love develops out of sex. And people start to want more time together, enjoy more and companionship and, frequently, a future. Relationships don't stand still. People having affairs learn this the hard way every day. And life gets more and more complicated and painful as a result. "

I think it can be considered a good thing for the person having an affair, everyone is entitled to a full sex life but at the same time every action we take other people too. It is often considered morally wrong mainly, I think, because of the effects on other people and the belief in monogamy.

Masturbation- the embarrassing questions

OK I decided to fight the embarrassment and answer the questions on the masturbation handout.

a) What are your earliest memories about self-pleasuring? What did you feel about it then?

Being 16 ish and gently massaging myself, thinking it felt good but nothing too special. Then 18 ish 'properly' masturbation in the bath, feeling naughty and secretive.

b) How do feel now about masturbation?

Fairly relaxed, still a bit naughty. I feel as though it is something that I shouldn't talk about.

c) What is your current pattern? When? How? Have you ever experimented with sexual toys?

In the bath/with my partner. I have one toy that came with a free magazine. I have tried fantasising as I don't usually.

d) Have you ever shared masturbation with a partner? If so, what was your experience? If not, why not?

Yes, I feel much more comfortable when I'm masturbating with my partner. Sometimes feels selfish.

Phew that wasn't too bad!!!!

comments on other people blogs about masturbation

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Masturbation (pre-lecture ideas)

As I said before I don't think masturbation is bad when it is private and only affects that person. I have been thinking about masturbation's place in relationships as that does affect other people and other possible reasons for it being 'bad'.

The main ideas for it being bad I think would be:

• (for men) the bodily fluid would be wasted during masturbation, this is particular relevant if you have strong Christian religious beliefs where sperm is only meant for procreation (I got these ideas off wikipedia)
• it could be considered selfish or cheating if you have a partner because you could have the same sensations but with your partner. It could also be a problem if one partner masturbates and then loses interest.
• the resources used to masturbate E.G porn, dirty talk through the Internet, looking at other people than their partners
• (for women mainly) losing innocence or becoming too sexual

I personally would feel really guilty if i masturbated then found out my boyfriend was 'in the mood' but I wasn't anymore because i had masturbated.

I also think though that knowing your won body allows you to be confident about yourself particularly during sex. (idea from Solo Touch)

more ideas on smoking (a comment from another people's blogs)

I have made the following comments on other peoples blogs

On "Being Bad Being Becky"'s blog (found at http://beingbadbeingbecky.blogspot.com/index.html)
You say "most people that regularly go to pubs smoke...Therefore it is plausable that they also regularly drink alcohol which has also been linked to cancer, heart disease and is just as 'addictive'."I think alcohol is possibly as addictive but there is a chemical in cigarettes which has been proven to be addictive (nicotine) an I don't know of any that have been found in alcohol. I also think perhaps there is a link between drinking and smoking in the sense people who go to pubs to drink are more likely to be exposed to smoke even if they don't smoke themselves. I hadn't seen the research about the link between smoking and Parkinson's. Very interesting although it seems to be a link between any addiction the chemical that an addiction causes.

Answers to questions posed in week 3 lecture

Family Guy, Breaking out is hard to do, 2005, Fox
Is shop lifting any different to any other kind of theft?
Yes:

• it's faceless
• small scale
• takes little planning

No:

• it is still taking someone else's belongings
• it is deceitful

Why do people who can afford to buy things shoplift instead?

• the thrill
• people believe the companies can afford the loss because of the large profit such companies make
• embarrassed to buy them (E.G. condoms)
• compulsion
• would not pay the money
• guilty- if only stealing luxuries- to be buying them at all

Breakfast at Tiffany's, 1961, Paramount

Is it prostitution to take money from someone who is expecting sex but not to supply it?

It isn't but to take the money knowing the person expects sex is either agreeing to prostitution or being selfish/deceitful. If it's unknowingly the money should probably be returned unless fault in communication is with the payer,

If it isn't prostitution then is it more or less socially respectable?

More socially respectable to be a prostitute than cheat someone out of money purposely because prostitutes are not being dishonest (by being prostitutes). There is also the distrust of anyone who has lied or cheated and got money out of someone unfairly plus the realisation that many prostitutes are prostitutes because they need to be rather than they want to be.

If it is then how much is a reasonable charge?

A 'reasonable charge' is logically the amount of money to cover costs (E.G protection and location) plus money to allow the prostitute to live (food, clothes, bills, etc). A reasonable charge in a prostitues eyes could be as much as the client is willing to pay. If no-one is willing to pay then there is no busoiness but as long as someone will pay high prices then the price will reamin high.

Peep Show, 3005, Objective productions

When does a cocerned interest in someone's activities become stalking?

when it is:

• an invasuion of the individuals privacy
• selfish and obsessive
• involving taking photographs

Are some kinds of observance allowable and appropriate? Which ones aren't?

appropriate:

• watching as part of daily life
• talking to the person
• for national security reasons (crime etc)
• asking for information about the person from friends

inappropriate:

• hacking into e-mail account or listening to voicemail/answer phone messages
• following people- especially to their home
• any observance that upsets the person and disrupts their life
• anything that stops the obsever living their life 'normally'- E.G. if they follow someone instead of working

Smoking (post-lecture ideas)

I actually missed the lecture because of all the snow but I managed to get all the notes off WOLF.

The thing I found particularly interesting was Jeremy Clarkson's comment in The Sunday Times that suggested that smokers contribute more in taxes on cigarettes etc than the NHS spend on them because of their smoking. I think this makes the arguments about smokers costing the NHS too much and damaging their own health to the point it is creating an NHS crisis pointless. It makes me feel more inclined to say smoking can be a personal choice because (as long as we have smoking and non-smoking zones) smoking is not having a significant effect on others. That is assuming the smokers avoid making others smoke passively.

I also had some ideas on the categories of smokers and to the four already suggested (regular, occasional, ex and non smokers) I think it could be relevant to add:

• social smokers


• passive smokers (either not worried about exposing themselves to others smoke or purposely being around smokers)


• one off smokers (that have once but otherwise decided not to)


• potential smoker (someone who wants to try smoking one day)

Personally I had been in the potential smokers category and have tried smoking once. I didn't like the taste, felt stupid and knew I couldn't afford to start smoking anyway. I do however sometimes enjoy being around smokers although I don't want to breathe all their smoke. Some of my friends do smoke. i don't look down on them for smoking but if I don't know someone smokes then I see them smoking I think it's a shame. I do think slightly less of them at first and it will make me see them as possibly less attractive (in the sense it would be harder to help them find a boyfriend/girlfriend). I have (I am slightly ashamed to say) enjoyed the taste of kissing a smoker, not that I would get my boyfriend to smoke just for the taste!

I am still no more for-smoking personally, as I would could never start smoking regularly, but I can see how the media makes it attractive. The main film I can picture is Grease where Sandy starts smoking to make Danny think she is 'cool'.

Just a quick extra note: after reading the draft of this post my boyfriend has said he'd be tempted to start smoking just for me, because I liked the taste (that kiss was before I started dating my boyfriend).

Smoking (pre-lecture ideas)

Firstly I think it's important to point out that in my family smoking is considered wrong and disgusting. My boyfriend thinks the same and has said that if I ever started smoking he would threaten to leave me if I didn't stop.

All pretty good reasons not to smoke. The there are the health risks and other damaging/unappealing side effects too! Stop smoking start living has many good reasons to give up and not start in the first place. Also the NHS website states

"Tobacco smoke contains over 4,000 different chemicals, many of which are poisons. Some might be relatively harmless by themselves, but together in smoke they make a toxic cocktail.


Poisons in tobacco smoke
Carbon monoxide is a poisonous gas linked with heart disease, stroke and other circulation problems.
Tar is deposited in the lungs with every breath of cigarette smoke taken. Tar causes cancer and damages your lungs.
Benzene is a solvent and is a known cause of cancer and is associated with leukaemia.
Formaldehyde is a poison used to preserve dead bodies. It is known to cause cancer, respiratory, skin and gastrointestinal problems.
Ammonia is used in cigarettes - it is also found in cleaning fluids.
Cadmium is a poisonous metal, used in batteries. It causes liver, kidney and brain damage. "

Also it shocked me to find out just how many smokers get ill from smoking and how much the NHS spends on treating smokers. If you have 2 minutes to spare I suggest trying this quiz out for yourself (LifeBytes-Smoking).


If all this wasn't an incentive enough I would hope this picture (from the new NHS get unhooked campaign) would be.

I can't really see any situations (in this country and our culture) where smoking is right. I can see how it is appealing with all the peer pressure but I would conclude there are more reasons against smoking than for. Now I'll wait and see how the lecture affects my views.

The first handout!

Last night (just before bed) I read the handout Portnoy's complaint by Philip Roth. As I should of been able to guess from the cover picture it was about masturbation.

Before I started reading it I already had the idea in my head that in most circumstances masturbation is a healthy and good thing. In my family it was never a topic of conversation so I always feel like masturbation is something that should be kept secret too. If it is secret and not talked about randomly then it can be good for our health.
I have mainly got these ideas from general advice sites I like browsing for example The Site.org or Teenage Health Freak. Both of which say it's perfectly normal and healthy.

However when I read the last paragraph of the handout I changed my mind (I don't want to spoil it for anyone who hasn't read it it yet and I think it is better to read it directly). As I said before masturbation in secret is fine, in my opinion. When it starts to affect other people, especially without then knowing it I think that takes it a bit too far!

As for masturbation that doesn't that is not meant to affect others (like privately whilst in a relationship) I am still undecided.

Well here goes!!

My first post on my brand new blog!!!!

As requested here are my suggestions for field trips (both silly and sensible):

• a trip to a casino (seeing as Manchester is going to have the super casino and we are going to be looking at gambling)
• a ciggerette factory (well why not!!)
• to see a comedian and then decide which of thier jokes we consider tasteful or just wrong!
• somewhere strongly religious like a monastry or nunnery

I can't think of anything else at the moment......